Something to offend EVERYONE! Mature Audience Warning
#1
Something to offend EVERYONE! Mature Audience Warning
>> > SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE!
>> >
>> > What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
>> > Juan on Juan
>> >
>> > What is a Yankee?
>> > The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
>> >
>> > What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
>> > The position of the dirt bag
>> >
>> > Why is divorce so expensive?
>> > Because it'* worth it.
>> >
>> > What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
>> > Doughnuts
>> >
>> > Why is air a lot like sex?
>> > Because it'* no big deal unless you're not getting any.
>> >
>> > What do you call a smart blonde?
>> > A golden retriever.
>> >
>> > What do attorneys use for birth control?
>> > Their personalities.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
>> > 45 lbs
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
>> > 45 minutes
>> >
>> > What'* the fastest way to a man'* heart?
>> > Through his chest with a sharp knife.
>> >
>> > Why do men want to marry virgins?
>> > They can't stand criticism.
>> >
>> > Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive,
>> caring, and good-looking?
>> > Because those men already have boyfriends.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
>> > After a year, the dog is still excited to see you
>> >
>> > What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
>> > The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
>> >
>> > Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
>> > Because they have cotton balls.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
>> > A porcupine has the ****** on the outside.
>> >
>> > What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
>> > "Are you sure it'* mine?"
>> >
>> > Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
>> > Mace will do that to you.
>> >
>> > Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
>> > Everyone has the same DNA.
>> >
>> > Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
>> > Breasts don't have eyes.
>> >
>> > Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
>> > He walks around saying "Yo."
>> >
>> > Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car
>> only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
>> > Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
>> >
>> > Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
>> > A different bar.
>> >
>> > Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
>> > They named him "Sum Ting Wong".
>> >
>> > What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
>> > A speech impediment.
>> >
>> > What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
>> > They're hiring.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
>> > A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of
>> the cage along with... "a recipe".
>> >
>> > How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
>> > Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
>> > A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." -A southern
>> fairytale begins "Y'all ain'tgonnabelievethisshit....
>> >
>> >
>> > Why is there no Disneyland in China?
>> > No one'* tall enough to go on the good rides
>> >
>> > What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
>> > Juan on Juan
>> >
>> > What is a Yankee?
>> > The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
>> >
>> > What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
>> > The position of the dirt bag
>> >
>> > Why is divorce so expensive?
>> > Because it'* worth it.
>> >
>> > What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
>> > Doughnuts
>> >
>> > Why is air a lot like sex?
>> > Because it'* no big deal unless you're not getting any.
>> >
>> > What do you call a smart blonde?
>> > A golden retriever.
>> >
>> > What do attorneys use for birth control?
>> > Their personalities.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
>> > 45 lbs
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
>> > 45 minutes
>> >
>> > What'* the fastest way to a man'* heart?
>> > Through his chest with a sharp knife.
>> >
>> > Why do men want to marry virgins?
>> > They can't stand criticism.
>> >
>> > Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive,
>> caring, and good-looking?
>> > Because those men already have boyfriends.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
>> > After a year, the dog is still excited to see you
>> >
>> > What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
>> > The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
>> >
>> > Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
>> > Because they have cotton balls.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
>> > A porcupine has the ****** on the outside.
>> >
>> > What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
>> > "Are you sure it'* mine?"
>> >
>> > Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
>> > Mace will do that to you.
>> >
>> > Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
>> > Everyone has the same DNA.
>> >
>> > Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
>> > Breasts don't have eyes.
>> >
>> > Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
>> > He walks around saying "Yo."
>> >
>> > Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car
>> only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
>> > Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
>> >
>> > Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
>> > A different bar.
>> >
>> > Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
>> > They named him "Sum Ting Wong".
>> >
>> > What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
>> > A speech impediment.
>> >
>> > What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
>> > They're hiring.
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
>> > A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of
>> the cage along with... "a recipe".
>> >
>> > How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
>> > Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
>> >
>> > What'* the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
>> > A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." -A southern
>> fairytale begins "Y'all ain'tgonnabelievethisshit....
>> >
>> >
>> > Why is there no Disneyland in China?
>> > No one'* tall enough to go on the good rides
#4
Senior Member
Certified Car Nut
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 11,269
Likes: 0
From: My reclining computer chair
Not to sound like a RP ranger but.............
http://www.bonnevilleclub.com/forum/...ghlight=offend
http://www.bonnevilleclub.com/forum/...ghlight=offend
#7
Senior Member
Certified Car Nut
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 11,269
Likes: 0
From: My reclining computer chair
Originally Posted by wjcollier07
apparently...i do apologize...
but i have not been keeping up with things here...so im trying to catch up....
but i have not been keeping up with things here...so im trying to catch up....
Unfortunately yours seems to be a case of early on-set
#8
Originally Posted by dbeast420
Not to sound like a RP ranger but.............
http://www.bonnevilleclub.com/forum/...ghlight=offend
http://www.bonnevilleclub.com/forum/...ghlight=offend
#9
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 16,539
Likes: 16
From: Purgatory, Pennsylvania
Originally Posted by dbeast420
Originally Posted by wjcollier07
apparently...i do apologize...
but i have not been keeping up with things here...so im trying to catch up....
but i have not been keeping up with things here...so im trying to catch up....
Unfortunately yours seems to be a case of early on-set
and Laffed all over again.
Some us get it early on and it called Potheimers desease