Slightly warped nursery rhymes
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Slightly warped nursery rhymes
Some of these ya may have seen,some maybe not.........
Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little bastard.
.................................................. ..................................
Mary had a little lamb,
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.
.................................................. ..................................
SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pie man,
"What have you got there?"
Said the Pie man unto Simon,
"Pies, you dumb #$%!"
.................................................. .................................
HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.
.................................................. ..................................
GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
.................................................. ...................................
There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad........
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.
Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little bastard.
.................................................. ..................................
Mary had a little lamb,
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.
.................................................. ..................................
SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pie man,
"What have you got there?"
Said the Pie man unto Simon,
"Pies, you dumb #$%!"
.................................................. .................................
HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.
.................................................. ..................................
GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
.................................................. ...................................
There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad........
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.
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