How to Shower
#1
Senior Member
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How to Shower
How to Shower Like a Woman:
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If
you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed
areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -
make mental note to do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg
cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it'* clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint
conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave
on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub
for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa
cake body wash..
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray
mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a
small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits; tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and
towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any
exposed areas.
How To Shower Like a Man:
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the
bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along
the way, shake privates at her making the 'woo-woo'
sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire
the size of your privates and scratch your ***.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face.
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water
rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh
at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and
surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs
stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor
because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole
time.
16. Admire size of privates in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor,
light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake privates at her
and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.
slightly edited for content
1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry
hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If
you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed
areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -
make mental note to do more sit-ups.
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg
cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it'* clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint
conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave
on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub
for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa
cake body wash..
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray
mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a
small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits; tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and
towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any
exposed areas.
How To Shower Like a Man:
1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the
bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along
the way, shake privates at her making the 'woo-woo'
sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire
the size of your privates and scratch your ***.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face.
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water
rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh
at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and
surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs
stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor
because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole
time.
16. Admire size of privates in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor,
light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake privates at her
and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.
slightly edited for content
#4
Senior Member
Certified Car Nut
Thread Starter
The thread in the forum I found this in said peeing in the shower was a cure for athletes foot. Something about the qualities of Uric acid
#6
Senior Member
Certified Car Nut
Originally Posted by MOS95B
The thread in the forum I found this in said peeing in the shower was a cure for athletes foot. Something about the qualities of Uric acid
#7
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Elizabethtown Pennsylvania
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#2 on the woman part is so true. Mine does this. She will cover up like I haven't seen her naked before.
As for the man part - I do everything listed, farting in the shower is my favorate
As for the man part - I do everything listed, farting in the shower is my favorate
#9
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well fellas I'm going to go take a shower. I think I will try to sing some britney spears with my A$$. My A$$ probably sounds better.